YM’s MT & R: #MAKEITHAPPEN.. SOCIETY PLEASE CUT WOMEN SOME SLACK….

Hello people..Hope everyone is doing great in their various parts of the world.It’s International Women’s day and this year’s theme is #MakeITHappen.

Women are a force to reckon with and are making happen around the world but there seems to be a continuous reminder (for lack of a better word) of what a women should or should not be doing.

Society, please cut women some slack! I think regardless of what women do people will still talk..Everywhere you turn are numerous articles and discussions about “What a woman should do” A woman should x, y or z short of solving a quadratic equation with various variables..


OK there goes my long rant…….

Girls are brought up to be nice..And without expecting them to date or express themselves sexually suddenly expected to marry by a certain age..A woman should be xxx to attract man, date and marry. A woman should marry by xxx age..A woman should be a perfect wife who can be a therapist, baby making machine, psychologist, operations manager, ego massager, chef, support your goals and dreams till she dies supporter etc etc.Ahh ahhh…

…why you di dress so, All this plenty book na for weti? You no go marry? Why you never born pikin…Hmm only girls? Wuna need chop chair oh.etc etc.Does it ever end??

Regardless of how women make the best of themselves..It seems being a strong, educated and empowered women is still frowned upon.. Add Feminist to the mix then you have just committed the biggest crime on earth.

And this because of….

Society’s  Expectation from Women & One Sided Preaching… 
Please why is everyone preaching to one side of the choir? What is expected from men? I think if 1/4 of what is expected of women is expected from men. Please don’t get me wrong I am not shooting  all men…. but it is just amazing to read some of the opinions of men about women in 2015. [or is it me and my thinking?? ]Sometimes it seems education, empowerment and emancipation are the worst things that happened to Women.

Parenting? 
I like this status update by Founder & Editor of Perception, Nono Nkele

Shame our Parents mothers particularly raised and taught us {daughters} to be strong opinionated women, stand up for what is right and not accepted and not be sward by archaic norms and stand up for our selves, fairness, justice, non yes men worshipers ,have our own careers et al but unfortunately neglected to teach their sons how to relate to the strong women they raised.. Who do we blame the mothers or the often absent fathers?

I have always thought this is a point of disconnect..So we went to Beijing and forgot to raise the sons to deal with this? My comment on this thread was

I have always thought that this is the point of disconnect. Sons need to be raised to deal with the strong woman! Massa both. Because the same father will tell his daughter to thrive for the best but castigate her for leaving an abusive marriage!

I think it still boils down to different expectations.

Patriarchy?

tell that one to some people. v sad! even the prized male child is just a polished trophy when it comes down to eat. even mothers will prefer them because of the security they are associated with – Ngum Ngafor, Blogger at Africally Speaking.

It’s a man’s world. Deal with it. I love this storify by Social Entrepreneur & Africa’s Tweet Queen, Kathleen Ndongmo which highlights Patriarchy.

Storify #2:Unlearning #sexism: Why men must dismantle the default sexism in THEIR LIVES

 

Women On Women? 
“Can we draft a joint resolution to drop the crazy-making expectation that we must all be perfect friends and perfect mothers and perfect workers and perfect lovers with perfect bodies who dedicate ourselves to charity and grow our own organic vegetables, at the same time that we run corporations and stand on our heads while playing the guitar with our feet?”  Quoting na article by Elizabeth Gilbert. Read  The Best Thing You Can Do For Yourself — And All The Women Around You” 

This post by Au Letch on Facebook  just speaks my mind to the nth factorial.

 

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And it ends….
WOMAN means :
W – WONDERFUL MOTHER
O – OUTSTANDING FRIEND
M – MARVELLOUS DAUGHTER
A – ADORABLE SISTER
N – NICEST GIFT TO MEN FROM GOD
.

It is not easy to be a woman!!

The next time any one wants to put a woman down whether married, single mum, single..Please just for a minute think about what  some of the s***women have to deal with..No one talks about

– The struggle and challenge in dealing with men in the name of “person di find massa”….
– The emotional baggage some women carry around because of a childhood rape experience
– The stress that single women go through because of society’s constant gaze.
– The emotional, psychological and physical abuse that women go through and are just meant to manage
– The Emotional trauma  after a miscarriage
– The Postpartum depression after childbirth
– The mental stress some women go through trying to conceive for one reason or other and worst if they are dealing with a health condition like fibrosis.
– The general balancing and juggling act of playing multiple roles

And the list goes on and on…
And because we [Camers, Africans] generally shy away from discussing  Mental Health issues, these things just get thrown other the rug..

Why Women’s Day? 

Picture Courtesy of the Independent



I totally understand why some people don’t buy the hype about women’s day..We talk and jubilate about Women’s rights for a day..then life continues. Somewhere..A girl is  refused a chance to go to school, married off or sold off to prostitutute. A woman dies at child birth, get past for a promotion as she climbs the corporate ladder and  stay at home mothers don’t get enough recognition for doing what they do…and the list goes on…I have always been vocal about anything  related women may be because I am in male dominated profession and  the struggle is both in my career and normal life.

I love today’s Women’s day posts by Find Palava Woman [Making it happen or taking it too far] and the HotJem [Happy Women’s Day..One love at a time]

 

Courtesy of the Hotjem

#MakeITHappen.Thrive to be happy and make things happen.

Just #MakeItHappen

Y.M.
IRepCamer

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